Emerging from yet another antihistamine coma, I realize that not only did I fail to update the blog for the last couple of months, I also failed to do anything remotely interesting enough to warrant updating the blog. So, for your edification (gotta use those college words somewhere) I decided to grace you, my gentle loving snowflakes of specialness, with yet another blog of the stuff I’m reading in order to keep from losing my mind over the snowpocalypse that just won’t end.

My mother, who truly knows and loves her daughter, picked me up some books from my Amazon wish list for Christmas. My favorite of the bunch was Bat Boy Lives! The Weekly World News Guide to Politics, Culture, Celebrities, Alien Abductions, and the Mutant Freaks that Shape Our World.

For a little bit of back story, I’ve been fascinated with the story of Bat Boy since I was a kid. It’s one of my weirder personality traits. I pick oddball things to research or follow, and Bat Boy was one of my first obsessions.

Weekly World News was one of my grandmother’s favorite gossip rags, so whenever I went to her house, I greedily devoured them. My mom refused to let trash like that in the house (her words not mine), and those tabloids were the only thing that made my trip to my grandmother’s anything other than the mind-boggling boring trip it was. I loved the garish pictures, the hyperbole, and the sheer outright batshit insanity of it. WWN was the best in straight up not giving a crap. It broke my heart when they folded, because then I would never learn the fate of Bat Boy (though they live on on-line, it’s just not the same). So when I opened my gift to find Bat Boy leering up at me from the covers of the book, I squeed. Yes, squeed. I had in my sweaty little mitts a copy of all Bat Boy’s stories.

Yes, Christmas at my house is magical. The opening of presents, the drinking, the swearing, and the traditional blowing up of the gingerbread house on Christmas morning. Ah, what memories are made of.

Moving on:

I just finished the first in the Jaz Parks series, Once Bitten Twice Shy by Jennifer Rardin. I really really wanted to enjoy this book more than I did, but I think I’m just plain burned-out on urban fantasy. Something needs to be done to the genre to revitalize it. More blood and gore, less love and sex, I think. I just want monsters to be monsters again, so my opinion is probably more subjective than the next random dude in line. If you enjoy kickass ladies with lots of lip and brooding vampire love interests, definitely check this out. It’ll be right up your alley.

Speaking of monsters, I’ve been on a Clive Barker kick lately. If one wants to write horror, there’s no better place to start than here to see how it’s done. I recently finished the first Books of Blood and loved it. British horror isn’t usually my thing, but his stuff is so dark and twisted and sexy in a scary way that I couldn’t put it down. I’m a few chapters into The Hellbound Heart, whom horror hounds will recognize as the literary birth mother of the Hellraiser movies. The movies, while good, never quite captivated me the way they seemed to everyone else, but the book has me hooked. I read a little bit of a night before I go to sleep, and then wake up in the morning wondering what the hell possessed me to read something like that and then sleep on it.

I picked up Nancy A. Collins’s new book Right Hand Magic while I briefly escaped the badger hole for food and supplies. I know, its urban fantasy, and yes, I remembered what I wrote a few paragraphs ago. That said, her books and I go way back. Sonja Blue was one of the first vampires I read outside of Dracula, and one of the first grown-up horror books I’d read. Talk about the original female ass-kicker! Sonja took no shit from anyone and got her hands dirty. I mean really dirty. There was sex and death, blood and gore, punk and gothic and she made it all so good. Maybe Sonja Blue spoiled me on a lot of what’s out there right now by setting my expectations so high, but that series is one I go back to at least once every few years to reread. I enjoy it just as much each time. Those books did a lot to shape how I wrote about monsters, too. I can’t recommend them highly enough to those who want to delve into the dark side. That’s why I’m taking a chance on her new series. She has my trust to give me a damn good read.

So there it is, a snippet of what I do to keep from losing my mind. Stay warm, my little frost-crystals.

Being a writer, words are my game. I gotta know ‘em. Not only do I have to know every permutation of, say, the word night, I have to be able to bust out just the right one at just the right time. So needless to say, I’m a nerd as quick with a dictionary as an Old West sharpshooter with a six iron.

That being said, there are some words I’ve grown to loathe. I hate them. Hate them so much I’d gladly shoot their family, burn down their house, and steal their dog just to watch them cry. Which is maybe taking things too far, but still, I dislike them with great intensity.

Of course I’ll do my best to explain why these raise my hackles. Some it’s just the way the word sounds or the way it feels in my mouth when I say it. Others I couldn’t even begin to explain. This won’t be a comprehensive list by any means, but I plan to hit the high marks.

Also, a lot of these are pop culture derived, which means I probably need to lay off the celebrity blogs and start filling my mind’s pie-hole with a higher level of entertainment.

Baby-bump – This word is just too cutesy-poo for my taste. Not to mention you hear it ad nauseum. So-and-so is showing a baby-bump. No, so-and-so is pregnant. I keep having flashbacks to my grandparents, who when talking about a pregnant woman would get a Very Serious Look on their faces, hide their mouth with one hand and whisper “She’s, you know, That Way.” Always followed by the conspiratorial solemn nod. For years I always wondered what that meant. I kept thinking they were radioactive, or aliens, or kidney stealers. When I finally asked my mom what they meant and she told me it was just a euphemism for pregnant, I was so annoyed. That’s it? She’s pregnant? That’s the big secret? Like the belly wasn’t a dead giveaway? It goes back to the writer needing to be specific about what’s being said. I hate ambiguity. Either say what you mean or shut up.

Booty – I just flat-out hate this word. Call it a butt, a rear, an ass, I don’t care. I just hate this word.

Dialogue – specifically when used as “you and I need to have a dialogue” or “let’s dialogue about this.” Sure, okay, we can have a dialogue about this, just as soon as I facilitate your sudden exodus to the nearest medical providing facility for being a glib jackass.

The word is TALK, people. Always has been, always will be.

Ironic – This word comes with a caveat. I don’t hate the word. I hate the way no one seems to be able to use the word correctly. As an example, on a news program I can’t recall at the moment, the anchor reported that the inventor of the Club, James Winner*, ‘ironically died in a car accident today.’ No. That is not ironic. Ironic would be if he died during a carjacking, or if someone killed him with the Club during a carjacking. A crude example probably made in poor taste, but it’s the most glaring example I can come up with. I’d blame Alannis Morissette for this, but honestly, I think it goes back much further than that.

(*condolences to the family)

Like – This is more of a conversational peeve. I like pie. I like cookies. I like shitty monster movies. All these uses are okay, even if shitty monster movies are usually, well, shitty. What bugs me is when, like, people use the word like, like a comma. See how annoying that is? I had a roommate in college who used this word constantly. She stayed on the phone from the time she awoke until four or five in the morning, and I never heard her finish a complete sentence. Example:

“Like, I know. He said, like, and I was all, uh-huh, but then like – I know! Like it’s just so, like damn!”

I lasted six weeks and told my RA to either move me or I was going to burn the dorm down.

Quirky – Writers use quirky as an excuse when they have a character too outlandish to be real but they just don’t want to axe them. You know the kind. The off-the-wall roommate, the mother-in-law with the just too strange collection of whatever. The list goes on and on. Your secondary characters need to be just as fresh and alive as your main characters, and giving them some off the wall characteristic is too often an easy shorthand way to make them memorable without investing any time in them. This may work in small doses, but after a while, it’s just trite. Quirky characters are often scene-stealers and a hoot to write, but then the first thought the reader has is “Oh look, he’s so quirky!” You have then officially taken them out of the story. Another thing: if the word quirky is used to describe your main character, I’m putting your book back on the shelf unread.

Snarky – I lived through the Buffy the Vampire Slayer heydays, and lord knows I can appreciate the zippy, sarcastic banter that was a staple of the show’s appeal. Hell, I trained at the feet of the master. Still, I am so bone-weary of so-called ‘snarky’ characters. Even the word makes me tired. Oh look, its Indistinguishable Heroine #87453 with her handy dandy Quips of Doom. There is nothing wrong with this character when done right. Everyone has a little bit of a smart-ass in them, but it seems like everyone in the urban fantasy genre has to be a stand-up comedian on the side. You know, some people can kick quite a lot of ass with very little lip involved. Anyone remember John Wayne? Dirty Harry? Chuck Norris? Charles Bronson, for God’s sake! Did he even talk in his movies? Quiet characters can be some of the most interesting and profound.

After all, you know what they say about the quiet ones . . .

Pretty self explanatory, and it sort of explains why I’ve been absent as of late. I’m hard at work on writing and submitting, obviously, but I’m also researching like a monster as well as checking out new books and music all the time. So, for the three of you that actually read this blog, I thought I’d let you know what I’m into at the moment.

Books:

Cuba: A New History by Richard Gott

 - A great history of Cuba from its aboriginal days to now.

Writing the Other (Conversation Pieces Vol 8.) by Nisi Shawl & Cynthia Ward:

a good book for those who are interested in writing about other races/cultures but not quite sure how to go about it without either appropriating the culture, misrepresenting it, or downright insulting it.

The Beast of the Haitian Hills by Phillippe Thoby-Marcelin & Pierre Marcelin

 Found this at a used book store for $3. The cover split the moment I opened it and it smells like a church basement. Needless to say, its an old book. Written by two brothers who grew up in the early decades of the 20th century in Haiti, they both dedicated their lives to preserving the Haitian countryside culture. A good read, if you can find a copy of the book.

 Music:

Shinedown is my favorite band right now, having suceeded The Tea Party for that honor. I got to see Shinedown in concert last year and they blew me away. The Sound of Madness is an excellent album, not a bad song on it, and one I actually broke down and bought on CD. I seldom do that anymore, not willing to shuck out money on a CD that has 2 or 3 songs tops that I like. The Crow and the Butterfly is my favorite right now, and serving as a great inspiration for a work in progress.

Breaking Benjamin is also a crowd pleaser. Dear Agony has a lot of moody music on it. It gets the blood pumping and the inspiration singing.

Theory of a Deadman is growing on me. I’ve like them since they came out, but only a few songs here and there. I wouldn’t turn them off if I heard them on the radio, but I never tried to find them while spinning the dial. (Radios still have dials, right? or is my car just that damn old?) They’ve gotten better with age and their latest album has some great new songs on it.

Poets of the Fall is a band that’s been around for a while, but one I’ve only recently discovered. Carnival of Rust is my current favorite, but they’ve got a sound that’s all their own and definitely worth a listen.

Movies/TV:

I should warn you in advance that I like bad movies. Like, bad movies that it would embarrass you to admit to liking. I recently purchased the Subspecies box set, so that should tell you everything you need to know. To me, there’s nothing better than kicking back with the roomies to watch a howlingly horrendous movie. That being said, here goes:

It’s Shark Week, so naturally, I’m scaring myself shitless every night with a Shark Marathon. Air Jaws is awesome!

Fright Night: Encore has been playing the crap out of this movie for a couple of weeks now, and I’ll put it on for background noise while I work. I just can’t get over how badly everyone overacts in this movie, or that Marcy Darcy was once so adorable.

True Blood Season 3 has been much better than Season 2. I just had a hard time getting into it last season, for some reason I’m still trying to figure out. To me, the characters are coming off a little more broadly-drawn and slapdash than they did in the first two seasons. I think that’s because the season’s plot is much more ambitious than the last two, so I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt. I adore Russell the Vampire King as a villain and can’t wait to see more of Eric (in every sense of the word)!

I finally purchased the Forver Knight Season 2 box in the Forever Knight trilogy, which means I now have the full set. Don’t know how many of you remember this show from the 90′s, but its a Camp Craptaculous alumni of the highest order. Overacting, sleazy plots, a vampire cop atoning for his past sins, and Nigel Bennet playing one of the best, coldest vampire villains of the last 30 years. Still still still love La Croix!

Sherlock Holmes: I’ve loved RDJ ever since I saw him in Chaplin. My mother took me to see it when I was 11 years old and we were the only two people in the theater. I bawled through the whole thing, and that year, I went as Charlie Chaplin for Halloween. Everyone thought I was a badly dressed mime, but that’ s beside the point. It’s awesome to see RDJ finally turn himself around and get the exposure he deserves. Not to mention the exposure he gets in Holmes. You’ll never look at those cute little decorative bed pillows the same way again!

Mythbusters: I can’t get enough of this show. Its nerd-candy.

The Smoking Gun’s World Dumbest: Yes, I’m ashamed of myself for enjoying this show so much.

This will probably be a semi-regular thing, if I know myself the way I think I do. So lets get to it, shall we?

Addison has a problem. She’s approaching her twenty-fifth birthday, and for this half-vampire witch, that means only one thing – ascendency. She begins to turn either into a daywalker or a full blooded vampire. Complicating matters, followers of her dead father Sebastia have decided to raise the vampire in a ritual requiring sacrificing Addison while she completes her ascendency. The only person standing between her, the world, and all hell breaking loose, is Julian, the 400 year old vampire responsible for killing Sebastian, with a strong distaste for witches and a harried past. Complicating matters is Julian’s best friend, Andre, who just as determined to win Addison’s heart as protect her from Sebastian’s followers.

This is a menage story, and a hot one. Here’s the link to Trista’s Webpage, which has a hot hot hot excerpt from Blood Rites and a link where you can purchase it from LooseId books. Check it out, you won’t be disappointed.

http://tristaannmichaels.com/my-books/blood-rite/

The end is upon us, my friends. I have finally joined the Twitter brigade. You can follow me at @zevonprice, because I’m imaginative like that. ^_^

Thank God, the winter seems to be finally over. I’ve never seen so much snow in my life, and hope to never see it again. I’m not a winter person. At all.

As such, the Rewrite of the Damned is still plodding along. I think I might, just maybe, have this bastard under control. This book has fought me every way it can, so many times that I’ve been tempted to trash it and just start over. I’ve never had a book fight me this hard before. It’s going to make finishing it all the sweeter.

That being said, I’ve also started a steampunk story which seems to be coming along at a decent clip. I should have it finished in no time, and I’ll put it out the door along with the other urban fantasy I’m shopping around. Who knows? I might actually finish out this year with a book on its way to being published!

Also, RAW (Lora Leigh’s Reader’s Appreciation Week) has put up its website, as well as a facebook page, so anyone interested should drop by both to see what’s going on. This will be my third year going as a reader and its one of the highlights of my year. Huntington is a gorgeous place with lots to do and see, and the event itself is a book lover’s dream come true. They’ve got some major talent showing up this year, including Jim Butcher and Shannon Butcher. The list of author’s coming is exhaustive, so there will definitey be something there for everyone. I heard through the grapevine that they’re trying to branch out from just strictly romance, so there should be a healthy mix of romance, urban fantasy, sci-fi, and other genres. And you get to meet Lora Leigh herself, so why haven’t you registered for this already?

http://www.readerappreciationweekend.com/

http://www.facebook.com/#!/group.php?gid=118192534860972

Well, that’s really all the updating I have for right now. Hopefully more will follow soon!

So looking forward to the RAW 2009 event happening at the end of this month. This is my second year in attendance (as a reader, not a writer . . . but maybe someday) and I’m looking forward to reconnection with old friends and making new ones. And buying books. Because who am I kidding. A Reader’s Appreciation Week without books is like a movie without Johnny Depp.

Summer got away from me, as it has a tendency to do. I woke up yesterday morning with chilled feet for the first time, and tromped downstairs to the bathroom thinking about how summer is now officially over.  September has given us glorious blue skies and that strange golden sheen on the leaves that makes everything look like its made out of spun glass, but like it or not, that just means things are going to get colder from here on out. I. hate. the. cold. *Grumps*

Work has been going well on the book. I’m having a few problems with figuring out how I want the next section to flow. Other than that, I’ve been astonishingly productive for this time of year, and hope the trend holds up. Nothing like finishing the daily wordcount with a huge buffer on the end to make one feel awesome.

So this is more or less a snippet of what’s been going on in my hectic whirlwind life *grins* and I hope the next time I check in, I’ll have something interesting or at least embarrassing to report. I usually get smashed at RAW (something about people thinking getting the cute redhead drunk is fun) so I’ll probably have something to lament when I get back.

If I can remember it.

I recently finished a book by an author I’m not going to name. She has a huge fan base, which obviously means her books appeal to someone, and what I have to say is just my opinion, based on my own very subjective tastes.

First, urban fantasy is my favorite genre right now, but paranormal romance is a very close second. A lot of what’s out there isn’t your mother’s Harlequins (not that there aren’t a few of those stashed in my closet either). Strong heroines, hard-ass baddies, heroes that can be just as much a monster as the bad guy, and problems that don’t go away with the wave of a fairy wand. They’re all there now.

But, unfortunately, for every good paranormal romance, there seems to be another one that takes every one of those hammered-flat clichés and runs with it. Hackneyed heroes, too-stupid-to-live heroines, bad guys that aren’t, vapid misunderstandings . . . I could go on for another ten pages. I hate that, because those clichés are what gives paranormal romance such a bad image.

I’ve read a previous book of this author before, and while it was cute, it really didn’t make me sit up and say, “Wow, I’m glad I just spent three days on that!” It wasn’t a bad book, just a lot of ‘meh’. I don’t have a lot of free time (as I imagine most of the world doesn’t) and really want the time I spend with my books to be special. I could be watching a Johnny Depp movie, after all.

I prefer my urban fantasy on the darker side. Hard questions, no easy answers, characters you love to hate, antiheroes and heroines, that’s what I enjoy. I knew this author wrote more toward the fluff side, but I do enjoy fluff from time to time. However, a book reviewer said this new series had branched to the darker side. I was interested in seeing how this author handled merging these two styles. And, I’ll admit, I was sucked in by the cover. This author has the best damned cover artists of anyone else out there. I don’t know who they are, but when my book goes up to bat, I hope the cover gods see fit to slide my book into their pile.

The book had an interesting, if well-trod premise. A vampire is on the loose, and other vampires have to bring him to justice before his rampage causes all of them to be discovered. The heroine and hero have to work together to stop this rampage, with all the problems one might think of when dating a creature of the night, coming to the fore.

I knew something was wrong when I was seventy pages in and still waiting for something to happen. I mean, the story was well written, I’ll give the author that, and that’s what kept me reading to see what would happen when things finally did pick up.

But they never picked up. I kept waiting for something to happen, but the character seemed to amble around with no real sense of urgency, or even concern. I know this is a paranormal romance, which means the romance takes the front seat and the mystery is the spice, but it’s hard to care about the crisis that drew these characters together when even they don’t care.

And that bring us to the characters themselves.

The Hero and Heroine were supposed to be hard-core professionals, an enforcer and a lawyer respectively, but I just couldn’t buy it. I know people goof off when they’re not on the clock, and my friends and I carried on like the characters in this book when we had our cheesecake/margarita parties in college. When I was in my late teens/early twenties. I hope law firms aren’t hiring kids that young to be lawyers these days, that’s all I can say.

The hunters weren’t much better. Maybe it comes from having police and law enforcement officials in the family, but I hope they take their jobs a little more seriously than the hunters in this book. For a vampire-run-amuck story, no one seemed to be concerned that, well, there was a vampire running amuck. I wasn’t very impressed with their deductive reasoning skills, either. I guessed the villain before he even made an appearance in the book. From a one-off line, I guessed it. Once again, I know that this is a romance first and foremost, but a little effort in developing the bad guy wouldn’t harm a thing.

That brings me to the biggest problem I had with the story itself. After two hundred and fifty pages of waiting for Hero and Heroine to face the big bad Baddie and stop the evil vampire from hurting others, it turned out that (SPOILERS for anyone who might have guessed the book I’m talking about) it was all a misunderstanding. There was no Big Bad Vampire. It was all just a misunderstanding and everyone just went home. (End SPOILERS)

What. The. Hell? I spend three days on this book when I should be working on MY book, and THAT’S the twist? I apologize for the caps, but that’s better than the two a.m. “What the freaking hell?” shout that rattled the pictures on my roommates’ walls. I even woke the dog.

Anyone keeping up with this blog has already read the post I made about Villains. You should know my feelings on this subject.

This just left me so unsatisfied. Every problem in the story was so simple to solve. Ultimately, there were no stakes, no real danger to anyone, and yes, of course the Hero and Heroine got to shag like bunnies. If you consider that a spoiler, you definitely need to read more. At the end, I felt like I’d been conned. The author promised something, and she didn’t deliver.

That’s the worst thing a writer can do. Not deliver. Like I said above, there are plenty of people who are going to love this book, and I’m obviously not the target reader. Maybe the fault lies more with me, since I picked this book knowing the author’s style, and yet still expected it to deliver the kind of story I enjoy.

But forget the urban fantasy part. Even as a romance, it just didn’t feel right to me. The Hero and Heroine spent all their time angsting like teenagers, not like adults. Or thousand year old vampires, in the Hero’s case. I certainly hope to God someone who’s been around the block that many times would have a little more maturity than the average horny teenage boy.

This one just didn’t do it for me. I felt there was so much the author ignored that could have made this a powerful story, more than a piece of fluff.

If nothing else, it’s inspired me to back through my own writing to make sure I’m not letting my own characters off too easy. Or letting them act like teenagers.

I love to read. I have a large pile of clothes in my floor, consigned to their fate there because I needed more space for books. I read a little of everything, nonfiction bring my favorite, but of fiction, I think urban fantasy is my favorite genre right now. The Harry Dresden series by Jim Butcher is my ongoing favorite. I was lucky enough meet Mr. Butcher at a book signing in Lexington, KY. He was a wonderful speaker, gracious and generous with all the questions, most of which he’s no doubt heard a hundred thousand times by now. He took the time to sign every single book, even after the bookstore had closed for the night, and never faltered in his friendly attitude. He even posed for a picture with yours truly. Once I get the pictures back from the developer (dingbat forgot to take her spiffy expensive digital camera and had to make due with a disposable one) I’ll post them here if my hair isn’t too heinous. Humidity and flaming red curly hair doesn’t mix well, and I refuse to look like Bozo any more than I can help.

Getting back to the point of the story, I hope I’m as cool as Jim Butcher once I get my book published and go on tour. He’s definitely a cool guy. Take the time to stop by his book signings if you can, and pick up the Harry Dresden books. You won’t be disappointed if you like your paranormal with a side of Sam Slade.

Ha! I told you I’d get around to writing something not about music!

I spent a wonderful past Wednesday with friends back in the Tri-Cities. I went to finish a project I can’t talk about yet. Hopefully I’ll be able to fill in the details for the three people who actually read this blog sometime in the near future.

If you’re ever in eastern Tennessee or thereabouts, I highly recommend stopping by Bays Mountain Park http://www.baysmountain.com/ for an afternoon. They have barge rides, camping areas, a wonderful tourist center, plus a brand new Planetarium you just have to see to believe. For less than you would pay for a burger, you can spend a wonderful half-hour learning all about the cosmos on a dome projection screen that puts you right in the middle of outer space. How realistic is it? I got motion sickness and nearly barfed all over the new carpet. But it was totally worth it, and yes, I’m going again as soon as I get back down there. I’m just going to take a Dramamine next time.

Bays Mountain also has a nature center and programs designed to introduce people to nature. They have bobcats, raccoons, a raptor center, wild deer, and wolves. If you don’t see anything else, definitely stop by the wolf pens and say hello. They have eight wolves and each one is gorgeous. Lucky me, I was fortunate enough to get the chance to help the keepers feed the wolves (a special treat) and I’ve never had more fun sticking my hands into squishy, bloody meat. Just grab a handful and toss it over the fence, and the wolves jump and beg like dogs. Like big, happy, hairy dogs big enough to ride like horses. But I wouldn’t advise it.

I’d never been fortunate enough to see a wild wolf before, but here you can get close enough to look into their eyes. Until you’ve done that, you have no idea what it means to be a part of nature. Their eyes gleam like moonlight, and there’s something so intelligent and alien there, it’s indescribable.

The herpetarium has plenty of snakes and reptiles for those of you who like creatures of the slippery, scaly variety. If you’re lucky, you may get the chance to meet Daisy the possum. She was hand-raised from a baby by one of the park employees, and loves attention. And marshmallows.

This only touches on everything Bays Mountain park has to offer. Hiking trails, lakes, rivers, wildlife. It’s all there. Just be respectful of nature and you’ll be welcome.

I spent most of my day there, finishing up the super-mysterious top-secret project, and then went out to dinner with what ended up being a truckload of friends. Mexican food has never tasted so good. Thank you La Carreta on Kingsport’s Stone Drive. Wonderful service, wonderful food.

I didn’t get home until after two that morning, and the drive back nearly killed me. It was totally worth it.

Plus, spending a day out in nature, away from home and work, put my mind in a place where it was happy to play. And play always means good ideas. Good ideas mean new stories, and yes, I’m working on yet another story. I couldn’t be happier.